do you ever feel lonely on some evenings ? on some nights when you are home, juz minding your own stuffs, then in the midst being reminded that you are still unattached (meaning, not having a steady boyfriend / girlfriend / soulmate) and not having that special someone to go out with these weekends?
well i do. it's been a ongoing thing and seems to be a little worse this year. well not that it's bad.... but the lack of company, i think, is not doing any good to the heart. let me explain.
2007 is perhaps the most lonliest year of my life. after a major fiasco in my studies last year, i have to repeat my specialization term again this year. becos most of my classmates by then had already graduated and were looking for jobs (for some of them, they already found theirs), in my case, i'm the only one left so for the last few months, i've been preparing my animation demo reel all by myself in a small classroom. occasionally there'd been some company but the people who are with me are usually students from another batch / course and i hardly get to know or talk to most of them. some companies can sometimes be a hassle however. there's this taiwanese divorcee who always had a endless amount of neccesary and unneccesary questions to ask me bout doing 3D and incidents like this tend to be more of a distraction than any help at all. i need to concentrate and focus hard and yes talk is good but not when i'm in the crucial stages of completing my studies. ironically these days, i kinda miss having her around as i'm back in class, working all alone for the last few weeks.
well, i think it's after the army that the times of being with my friends are greatly reduced. so's the case after graduation. i might probaly looked desperate to you; there are days when the feeling of lonliness is strong enough that i ended up surfing dating websites and then realizing the supposed 'foolishness' i got myself in, quickly log off out of personal embarassment. i'm the kind of person who dun believe in getting a mate through blind dates, online dating or social events that's specially setup for singles. and here i'm wishing i don't have to be single for long. well, that's the trouble with me.....
anyway, feel free to share your thoughts if you are in the same situation like me (even better, you never did have a stead counting from the day of your birth till now) or was once in there. i would like to hear your replies.
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